Thank you for not being perky

I sometimes take delight in dressing Mr. Pants funny. He’s pretty suave and can pull off plaids and stripes together, the crocs may have been a bit much though.

Every evening Vim and I discuss Mr’ Pant’s day, telling each other the cute or horrid things he did. The horrid is pretty rare but sometimes I have to say something like, “He was kinda whiney today” but that’s the extent of it.

Lately he has started to tell some little stories. He’ll hold one a toy animal and hand one to me and then here’s how it goes -
Him: HI!
me: HI!
him: walk?
me: okay!
him: uh oh! Fall?!
me: oops
him: okay? sad? *makes kiss noise*
me: i’m okay now.
Him: Happy! Bounce!

wash, rinse, repeat

Anytime he wants something not food he says, “Toy?!” and tries to grab it. H is now also in the repeating what you say phase. In the grocery store this weekend I said, “Now I am buying some nonfat milk!” and then the whole rest of the time we were there he screamed FAT at every opportunity.

We took him to see the movie UP this weekend. We all enjoyed it. He loudly said HOUSE! FLY! every five seconds. At least we all know he got the movie…

Skip the following if you do not want to read a boring ass account of a day with a toddler. srsly.

Here’s a typical day for us -
Today we woke up and played upstairs, came down and ate. I ignored him for a bit and wasted time at the computer then we walked to the library and barged in on the older kids story time. After the songs and stories Jack played with some puzzles nicely with the older kids. Then we went to the park and met up with the daycare group of 2 years olds that is always there in the morning. There are six of them all just Jack’s age and they all toddle around after each other cutely. We came home and he ate a godawful amount of bunny crackers, pooped and then fell asleep in his fort before I could wisk him off to change his diaper and put him down in his crib. Of course he only slept for like and hour and when he woke up I tried putting him in his crib for more sleep. He played in there for about 20 minutes before demanding I come in there and play with him. Then I had to play hide and seek with every frigging stuffed animal in the universe for about an hour. I was bored and tried to convince him to leave the crib. Oh, also, at some point earlier he spilled his entire lunch on his security blanket. So I tried to make a game out of washing it… FAIL. We ended up with him naked in the bathtub with a soaking wet blanket freaking out that I was trying to take it to put it in the dryer… WTF, now I have set a precedent that he can have his blanket in the tub?! Fuckity. back to realtime: I get him out of the crib and am still bored, must leave house pronto or will go insane. I put him in a size 3T super man shirt and the shorts he has been wearing for the past 3 days. We go drive by a couple of houses for sale. One is so cute my head exploded and the other is really fucking ugly. We go to Betty’s to get some lentil salad and Jack eats about a pint of it. He holds a spoon in one hand and a fork in the other and shovels the lentils in as fast as he can. I sit there with my coffee reading “Marked” on my new iPhone with the kindle app. I text Badger some funny bits and she sends me some foreshadowing plus updates about her nose eating aliens. Trains go by and Jack waves his arms around and screams with delight. I consider stopping by Good Vibrations but worry about having a kid with me. Will they let him in? (ANSWER: YES. I asked later when I went in without him and they were like, “totally! they think they are in a toy shop, it’s hilarious!” So now I know.) We come home and I let him watch a baby signs DVD. Vim gets home and I leave for some shopping and a failed doc appointment.

Phew! That was a long day.

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